Let me commend to you a new book by Kathleen Rehl, Moving Forward on Your Own: A Financial Guidebook for Widows. Kathleen, a fee-only financial planner, was my guest on my last teleconference. (See here for my brief summary of her comments.) I bought the book after the teleconference, and it’s a wonderful resource. A widow herself, Kathleen has put together a book which is both artistic and practical. Several sections of the book would be good for anyone, such as “What’s Your Money Style.” She says, “Ultimately, it’s not about the money. Rather, it’s about understanding your money and how you react so you recognize your natural inclinations toward spending, saving, giving, and investing, and what’s motivating those habits.” That’s something we all need to work on.

Are you feeling the need to reinvent yourself in ministry? I’ve been listening to and reading about the singer Tony Bennett lately. I’m finding it an inspiration. Here are four items I’ve been reflecting on:

1. Be yourself, and do what you do best. Bennett’s career took a downturn in the 60s and 70s with the rise of rock music. His label, Columbia, made him do an album of pop music (a dismal failure by everyone’s standards). He said it literally made him sick to do that album. And he quit the label. He has stuck with the songs he loves, including his signature song, “I Left My Heart in San Francisco.” He reinvented himself for a new era – but he didn’t stop doing what he does best. In ministry, plenty of people will try to tell you what you ought to be and do. While adaptability is important, don’t compromise the core of who you are. That’s what God made you to do.

2. Collaborate with younger people. When Bennett hit bottom in 1979, he asked his son to take over as his manager. And he listened to what his son said. He sang on MTV. He did an album of duets a few years ago with musicians like Elvis Costello and K.D. Lang. The result: A career that has gone on into his 80s. My young adult children know who he is (and not just because I’ve told them). For those of us who are getting older in ministry, developing relationships with creative and energetic younger folks can put some juice into our own work.

3. Express yourself creatively outside of ministry. Bennett began drawing as a child and never stopped. He studied painting seriously in the 1970s when his singing career was not going so well. He’s had exhibits of his paintings. (See his art work here.) What do you do that gives you creative satisfaction that is not at church? It’s a God-given gift, and it will feed your ministry.

4. Keep learning. Tony Bennett says the best advice he ever got was from the cellist Pablo Casals: “At any given moment you can learn.” Bennett says, “Isn’t that wonderful? The way he spoke. The way he spoke…” (Tony Bennett in the Studio: A life of Art and Music, p. 158). No matter what the challenges of ministry, of the wider society and even our personal lives, we can learn at any moment.

Financial adviser Kathleen Rehl had some terrific recommendations in today’s teleconference. She said that clergy who do better with their money “pay attention to their stuff and where it’s at.” They save some of their money (she recommends 10%), and they are aware of and take advantage of tax benefits for clergy.

She said some clergy say to her, “God will provide.” She says, “I believe God provides for us, but God gives us tools to get involved.” For those who are stuck in this area, she suggests expressing an intent to want to do something about it. “If there’s no desire, it’s not going to happen.” She suggests taking one small step at a time to move forward.

Asked how clergy might deal with the economic uncertainty we all face, she said, “I like to focus on things that you have control over.” These are items such as what you spend, what you can save, the length of time you are invested, and investing in a variety of investments. What you don’t have control over is market return. She suggests ignoring all the TV shows and financial magazines which say one thing one day and another the next.

The recording of the teleconference is available. E-mail me at Margaret@margaretmarcuson.com, and I’ll send you the link. Kathleen Rehl is the author of Moving Forward on Your Own: A Financial Guidebook for Widows, coming out next week.

“A prudent question is one-half of wisdom.” Francis Bacon

My husband, Karl, a reference librarian, sometimes brings me home quotes he has come across in his work. This week he gave me this Francis Bacon quote. In church leadership and in pastoral care, sometimes questions are more important than answers. Our need to have the answers sometimes comes out of our own anxiety — we can feel like we are there to solve problems, to help people and to fix things. Asking thoughtful questions can help others find their own resources. It can be tempting to make the questions leading ones: “Don’t you think you should….?” But it’s more helpful to ask open-ended questions, the kind that cause people to pause and stare into the distance and truly reflect on their life, or on the life of the church. I notice when someone asks me a good question, I calm down and can think more clearly.

What’s the proportion of questions to answers in your conversations with folks?

On Writing Well is a classic book on writing by William Zinsser. Jill Kelly, my writing coach, blogged about it last month here. I bought it for myself, and I highly recommend it for every pastor — for everyone, really. I’m about halfway through, and I see how much clutter and lack of clarity there is in my own writing — and I have an idea of how to improve. Clear writing is important for leaders, whether you are writing sermons, newsletter articles, blog posts or e-mails. Zinsser’s book will help you improve your writing and assess the writing of others. He’s also entertaining. The book has been in print for over 30 years, with good reason.

We had a terrific conversation with family therapist and clergy coach Elaine Boomer on triangles at church around money. Here are a few quotes:

“Money is the hot topic everywhere, in my work with families and in my work with clergy. Money is a repository for anxiety. Anxiety is always floating around in churches and families and businesses. For example, if a pastor leaves a church, the anxiety goes up, and it looks for a place to land. In most churches it lands on money.”

“All triangles work the same: money isn’t the issue, it’s the anxiety. Look in your own family of origin and see what makes you anxious and what doesn’t. In all triangles you always have to be aware of what’s going on inside of you.”

“Don’t be so obsessed with the outcome. Stephen Covey says, “Do things with the end in mind, but let go of the outcome.” So you see possibility but you’re not so tied up with the outcome. It’s not about having no opinion but about letting other people in the triangle work out how they are going to be with the money.”

What does your post-Easter schedule look like? Perhaps you had this week off. Jill Kelly, the writer and editor who leads my writing group, shared this quote from Thomas Merton last night:

To allow oneself to be carried away
by a multitude of conflicting concerns,
to surrender to too many demands,
to commit oneself to too many projects,
to want to help everyone in everything,
is to succumb to the violence of our times.

Merton wrote this decades ago, and these words are more provocative than ever.

Today I met with a group of Presbyterian ministers here in Portland, Oregon. We’re going to spend a few months discussing my book, Leaders Who Last. We spent some time today talking about overfunctioning. One of the group members, Susan Grewe, co-pastor of Savage Memorial Presbyterian Church, quoted an important mentor of hers, David Steele. He said, “the art of ministry is knowing what not to do, and not doing it.”

There are really two parts to putting this counsel into practice: first of all, we have to figure out what not to do. What is our job, and at least as important, what isn’t our job. Then, and what may be harder, we have to discipline ourselves not to do them. For us overfunctioning types, this creates anxiety (what if no one steps in to do this essential thing which I know is not mine to do?) I have to be honest and say sometimes I know what not to do, and do it anyway (reminding my husband of things falls in this category).

Do you know what not to do? Can you not do it?

I find plane flights the best way to catch up on my Christian Century reading. I was struck by Adam McHugh’s article in the Nov. 17, 2009 issue, “Can introverts lead?”. A couple of samples: “The long-term sustainability of an organization or a church cannot depend on the personality of the central leader, no matter how captivating or compelling that person is.” And this: “Character in a leader is the quality that has the ability not only to draw others but also to maintain their loyalty…The central component of character is authenticity. Someone with character acts in unison with his or her God-given nature.” This article is not just for introverts.

Kirk Byron Jones’ comments on yesterday’s teleconference about finding spiritual support for your ministry were uplifting and encouraging.

Here’s just a sample: “We must give ourselves more time to just be. We are addicted to distraction and busyness…This is about challenging some deeply held convictions about what it means to be human and to be in ministry. We do not work for acceptance but work from acceptance. We do not just receive the grace of God but revel in the grace of God and roll around in it. The scripture does not say, BE busy and know that I am God but the scripture says, BE still. If we can still ourselves with our perceptions, worries, rules and relax our spirits in the Spirit of a loving God who loves us just because, that is very enlivening. That is being for being sake. It tastes good because one’s identity is detached from productivity and productivity in a role. Each of us is a child of God and through each of us God is having a unique human experience. Spirituality becomes paying attention to my own humanness and what is going on around me….if we receive those gifts fully, the energy will be there when it comes to sermon preparation time. There is a circle of rest: resting in God leads to peace, peace leads to clarity and clarity leads to creativity. We do not really know what it means to be on until you know what it means to be off.”

Kirk’s website is kirkbjones.com.

The recording of the teleconference is available. E-mail me at Margaret@margaretmarcuson.com, and I’ll send you the link.